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05/02/2018 By Isla Baliszewska

5 Hot Tips for Overcoming Obstacles & your Inner Critic

It’s all about mindset

What you say when you talk to yourself [Shad Helmsetter’s best-selling book]

Why you give the imposter syndrome permission control your life

Whether you are prepared to act ‘as it’ – even ‘fake it till you make it’

How much you indulge your gremlins, those inner critics.

Susan Jeffers wrote a whole book on ‘Feel the fear and do it anyway’.

FEAR = False Evidence Appearing Real.

It is essentially about the choices we make. What if you choose to replace fear with another, stronger emotional driver; that of core confidence? Choosing to be controlled by your inner critic is very exhausting and destructive, as is the Imposter Syndrome. Experiment using Appreciative Inquiry’s approach, which is so simple and might need practice: appreciate what is working well and what could work even better – which circumvents anything negative.

Consider carefully when you say yes to your inner critic what it is that you are saying no to. And consider when you say no to your inner critic what is is that you are saying yes to. Ask yourself what is the pay off?

“I’d wake up in the morning before going off to a shoot and think, I can’t do this; I’m a fraud.” – Kate Winslet, Academy Award-winning actress

“I have written eleven books, but each time I think, ‘Uh oh, they’re going to find out now. I’ve run a game on everybody, and they’re going to find me out.” – Maya Angelou, Pulitzer Prize-nominated poet and author

“I am always looking over my shoulder, wondering if I measure up.” – Sonia Sotomayor, first Hispanic U.S. Supreme Court Justice

What if, whenever an obstacle appears or arrives in your life, instead of getting despondent, being stopped, letting it get bigger and bigger, feeling it’s not fair or giving up you made different choices?

What if Google Translate interpreted ‘obstacle’ as a challenge to be solved? How might that approach influence your mindset? What inspired solutions might emerge?

5 Hot Tips (with thanks to Abraham)

1. Tell a better-feeling story about the things that are important to you.

2. Don’t write your story like a factual documentary, weighing all the pros and cons of your experience

3. Instead tell the uplifting, fanciful, magical story of the wonder of your own life

4. Watch what happens as you make different choices

It’ll feel like magic as your life begins to transform right before your eyes!

“Whatever you think you can you can and whatever you think you can’t you make that happen.” Henry Ford shone this spotlight on the power of your thinking to create your reality.

What will you choose?

Halina Jaroszewska Jan 2018

05/01/2018 By Isla Baliszewska

Time Management that works for you

Make this New Year of 2018 the year when you manage time rather than assuming it manages you;

make this New Year of 2018 the year during which you design and create new or different ways

of doing things better or differently.

Everyone has 24 hours x 365 days per year x number of years in one’s lifetime.

Exactly the same amount paid into each individual’s time ‘bank’ account at one nano second past midnight on January 1^st each year. How do we view that deposit? Do we even give it a thought? Does it warrant a cursory glance? Do we give a nano second’s consideration as to how we will use the time deposited? Does it even cross our minds to make one New Year’s resolution to use every nano second to the absolute max in whatever way we choose? Do we make any plans at all?

Or do we, without a scrap of consciousness, allow ourselves to be swept away on the tidal wave of time with a wild ‘wheee’ of gay abandon making it OK by thinking it’s just another year like any other. And then when 31^st December arrives as it inevitably does each year wonder in genuine puzzlement as to where that year has gone and why everything we had wanted to do is still on the list [if there was ever one in existence].

Fact is if we fail to plan we plan to fail.

Maybe we labour under the misapprehension that we have no control over time. In some ways that is correct as we humans have invented time pieces of all shapes, sizes, dimensions and mechanisms and they register the regular passing of each second so that we can keep on track throughout the world.

However the control that all of us have is how we use each of those seconds. Whether we use them consciously or let them slip away without regard. What would you prefer to be in charge of your time or let it vanish unused. Even if for example you have a boss who orders how you use your time at work; a family who absorb your time at home you still can be in control of how you approach each second you spend in either situation.

How about experimenting with a different perspective?

How about valuing each second, savouring each moment, getting total pleasure in each time slot as if it might be your last? How might that change your approach to time and enable you to discover different ways of doing the same old thin g that will make the difference?

You may be started to read this article thinking ‘Yippee! I am going to get a whole list of ways to manage my time … all the hard work will be done for me’. Nice try! How I might organise / use / appreciate my time will be radically different from yours. It is for you to take a slice of time to consider all the excuses, reasons why, reasons why not that are your favourites as to why you run out of time / don’t have enough time / can’t find time etc. And to call yourself to account to ditch the old, out dated, routine ways you have used to date and surprise yourself with how inventive you can be especially regarding procrastination.

In a Youtube clip re mobile phones Simon Sinek talks about ‘in between time’ as the time when relationships are built. He advocates using time to connect rather than being distracted by those incessant pings demanding attention. Maybe that is where you could start with managing time differently, more effectively by relegating your mobile phone to the position of a useful tool rather than a demanding toddler!

For some help with ways to manage your time bank and keep control, get in touch.

Halina Jaroszewska 2018

28/09/2017 By Isla Baliszewska

Get out of your own way

Ever bumped into yourself and thought ‘please can you just move out of my way?” Weird as this might sound, it may hide a powerful message. I’m not the first coach to think how cool it is to help people ‘get out of their own way’, it is a concept that has been around for a while but one which, very interestingly, people too often just don’t get.

In a nutshell, we can be surprisingly unintelligent about when it is ‘us’ that is the reason things are not going the way they should be. That applies both at work and in our personal lives.

In the business arena and trending at the moment is Michael O’Leary of Ryanair, once heard to say “I’m underpaid compared to Premiership footballers” and only this week being reported as blaming the cancellation of 40/50 flights per day and the shortage of pilots to a management mess-up. A charismatic leader, synonymous with a powerful brand that he built, Mr O’Leary could be held up as an example of ego leading to blindness in decision making.

As for affecting our personal lives, Indra Nooyi’s 7^th critical lesson for running a Fortune 50 company in the 21st century is ‘Leave your crown in the garage’. As CEO of Pepsico she is worth listening to; “No matter who we are, or what we do, nobody can take our place in our families.” Her point is about remembering the other roles we have in our lives, those in addition to the one where we think we are ‘It’. In those other roles we might be server, facilitator, supporter, carer and these are equally as important as being the boss.

Being good in any role, particularly where you are in charge, entails remaining grounded when you are being successful. Being the one in control necessitates a level of emotional intelligence that lets you keep clear judgment and make decisions with the knowledge that they impact positively on those on the receiving end.

This isn’t about dumping your ego. We all need our egos, they embody our will, our drive, our passion, our individuality. It’s important to acknowledge our successes and strengths. It’s equally important to notice those moments when your back patting becomes self-aggrandisement that threatens to make you think you’re infallible.

To ensure you wear the crown at the right times we offer these tips:

Know that you don’t always have to be right – inviting the views of others contributes to better informed decisions and may show you something different and better.

Surround yourself with people that are not always just like you – opposing viewpoints and perspectives lend strength and clear judgement.

Be aware of what your impact is downstream – who is affected by what you do, say and decide, and are they being affected the right way.

Be transparent and sharing – building silos and Chinese walls invariably results in getting someone’s back up and inviting suspicion and confrontation.

Listen, pause, and think about all the options. Only then are you in the right place to make the right decision.

You don’t always have to be a hero.

Isla Baliszewska

31/08/2017 By Isla Baliszewska

Are you selling to your customers the right way?

Personally I make purchasing decisions very quickly based on very little information and an appeal to my emotions. “How will it look/feel if I buy this?” Do I treat clients the same way? If I followed “I treat my customers the way I like to be treated” then I would. And would that get those people want to be my customers? Would they be happily sold to by me?

We are all different and we make our buying decisions differently. Some people like lots of facts, they are ‘maximisers’, thoroughly researching the market to ensure they have covered absolutely all the options. Others like to take a lot of time to make purchasing decisions. Some people like to engage in a dialogue, have a conversation. Others like to be left alone to examine all the evidence, then come up with the questions, and make a considered decision.

So what do you do? And do you know why you do it?

If you already have your C-me colour profile you have the edge in understanding what your preferred way of thinking and doing is and what informs your decision making process, including what and how you buy things. You appreciate whether you tend to the rational or the emotional, the big picture or the detail. And you will know how you like people to engage with you. That is really powerful stuff when you are being sold to.

Standing in your customer’s shoes

Anyone in business is looking for customers. If you could assess potential customers using indicators that demonstrate their buying preferences, that would be amazing. You would be better equipped to know how to approach them, what to say, when to say it and how to deliver your message, whether written or spoken, social media or email. So brilliant if you can ask your clients to do a C-me, however that might be a bit tricky!

But…if you know your own preferences when it comes to communicating with potential customers, imagine how useful that would be. Maybe you aren’t comfortable with reaching for the phone and having that difficult negotiation. Maybe you find you can’t stop talking when you get in front of someone. A C-me profile will give you that knowledge and enable you to see how your clients are communicating with you and help you look for clues as to best ways of reaching out to them. And depending on how they communicate with you, you will know how much you may need to adapt your natural preferences to negotiate that sale. That could be the difference between failure and success.

You can only treat your customers the way they like to be treated when you know how they like to be treated. And you can only make that effective in sales terms if you know how you are communicating with them.

Find out more about how C-me Colour Profiling can help with your sales and enhance your relationships with your customers, both those you already have, and those you are approaching.

David Rigby 2017

20/06/2017 By Isla Baliszewska

Observations on the OverPromoted Manager

A Guest Blog by Michael Shanahan

“During everybody’s career it’s probable they will come across a senior manager that has been promoted above their abilities. People can often talk the talk but when it comes to delivering when elevated to positions of power and authority they flounder. Sometimes they just don’t have the confidence to push forward ideas and take risks, while others believe the promotion is the be all and end all and they can take their foot off the pedal and coast, leaving the hard work to the underlings.

How should those reporting to the overpromoted manager react, especially when credit for good work is taken by the boss and brickbats for foul-ups are hurled downwards?

Who could believe that one of the most interesting examples of an over-promoted boss is currently residing in the White House and is arguably the putative leader of the Free World? President Donald Trump certainly doesn’t fall into the group that lacks confidence in their own abilities and he’s certainly willing to take risks. And while you can’t accuse him of taking his foot off the pedal and coasting, he could be seen by some as being fundamentally lazy. It seems he can’t be bothered to read briefing notes, gets his news from TV and ignores advice, especially about giving up his Twitter addiction. And while it’s hard to feel sympathy for his acolytes in the Oval Office, they appear to be taking a daily kicking from the President for failing to remove him from the holes that he has spent the previous 24 hours digging. And so there’s no surprise that his organization is leaking like a sieve with bad news reports following bad news. His staff are doing what so many people do when they’re treated badly by an incompetent boss. They’re hanging him out to dry.”

Michael Shanahan – June 2017

Writer, recorder, erstwhile interviewer and editor, and long-term observer of people, events and life.

Our thanks to Michael for highlighting aspects of managerial/leadership behaviour that prompt the wrong kind of response from those on the receiving end of it. Thoughts like these prompt us to take a long hard look at what works well – get in touch with us to find out how we can work with you to create the right leadership.

5 Hot Tips for Overcoming Obstacles & your Inner Critic

It’s all about mindset

Time Management that works for you

Get out of your own way

Are you selling to your customers the right way?

Observations on the OverPromoted Manager

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