Training & Coaching News from Smart Coaching Training

03/10/2020 By Eric Moore

The Age of Anxiety

“West Side Story” composer Leonard Bernstein’s Symphony No. 2 The Age of Anxiety was composed from 1948 to 1949 in the US and Israel. It is titled after W. H. Auden’s poem of the same name. Was 1949 the Age of Anxiety or is it now? Most of us have some form of anxiety in our lives and with the continued events of 2020 it is becoming more prevalent.

Our trainer Eric Moore. Ask about individual and group wellness at work coaching

Coping Mechanisms

To combat anxiety people will employ different coping mechanisms to help deal with their anxiety. These may include, exercise, going for a walk, listening to music, or some other form of distraction, though when it strikes these often fail, because the problem is neurological, so therefore to successfully cure anxiety the changes need to take place at the neurological level. Another mechanism many use is to try and avoid the situations that cause them to feel anxious or panic. This though prevents, change and growth. Another thing I often come across is hearing clients say “It happens to me – I don’t make it happen”. This mindset can unfortunately prevent the person from taking ownership of the problem.

Causes of Anxiety

Anxiety is caused by an over arousal of the autonomic nervous system, so someone will often get anxious before they even know it, and by the time this happens it’s too late. So they say “it’s not my fault since it happens automatically”. However they created it due to reacting to an external stimulus such as crowded spaces, social gatherings, giving a presentation. This can then generalise, so even the thought of it becomes enough to create the anxious state.

Fight or Flight

This triggers the fight or flight response in part of the brain called the amygdala and can cause a myriad of issues both psychologically and physiologically. Dry mouth, sweaty palms, palpitations, racing heartbeat and thoughts, tightness or pain in the chest to name a few.

Internal Dialogue

Taking responsibility and owning it is one of the steps to overcoming this debilitating issue towards recovery. Anxiety and panic is often a function of the internal dialogue and the images one creates in the mind. Intervening by changing the images and speed of what is said internally are key to becoming anxiety free. Now, depending on the type of anxiety there will be more activity in one hemisphere of the brain and another tool for change is to engage both hemispheres whilst thinking of the anxious state. If you are curious about to take back control and become anxiety free then join our workshop here on send us a message here.

Written by Eric Moore , Smart Coaching & Training Ltd.

23/04/2020 By David Rigby & Martin Kubler

I’ve never been to me

Becoming confident enough to be yourself

‘I’ve never been to me’ is a song by Charlene which went to No 1 in the UK charts in 1982. For many it is the worst Motown Number One ever, but is pertinent to the situation (COVID-19) we find ourselves in now.

The cheesy lyrics include the lines ‘I’ve been to Nice and the Isle of Greece… but I’ve never been to me’. It is about having to always be someone else and never being allowed to even find out who you are, let alone actually be that person.

Forward to late 2019, and many in the music industry, as in many other industries, are forced to subsume themselves into industry norms and accordingly standardise their personalities. Paradoxically the most successful have not done this. Good recent British examples have been Amy Winehouse and Adele who refused to follow the norms. An outstanding American example, even subject to a BBC Radio4 Profile, is the singer Lizzo – larger than life in every category, a phenomenal singer and performer who has no need of pitch correction in her performances.

Come 2020 and COVID-19, the requirement of the performers to be who they are and deliver has never been on show quite so much as the ‘One world’ show where performers such as Lady Gaga, Sam Smith and Andrea Bocelli, and many others sang together, each performing from their own home. No lavish productions or autocorrect to prop them up. And, of course, it is significant who is not performing and the conclusions we can all come to about their skills.

How does this affect us?

Many of us are now in lock down and the only places you can go are shops to buy food or pharmacies to pick up meds – the rest of the time, you are at home, either by yourself or with some version of immediate family.

It is the perfect time to discover who you really are – a great opportunity for self-examination, and if you don’t like the ’me’ you actually are, you can set about changing it.

Many are using this period as a great opportunity to organise themselves, deal with all the filing and position themselves for the future. And then see others, via Zoom, who are in a bad way, and cannot cope with the uncertainty.

Sphere of influence

The ‘sphere of influence’ model is useful here. Issues divide into three :

Inner circle: those issues you can deal with by yourself;
Outer circle: those issues you can deal with by collaborating with others;
Outside both circles: those issues which you absolutely have no influence over.

Many of the issues thrust upon us by COVID-19 are things we have no influence over, so the first step is STOP worrying about things you can do nothing about.

Divide the things you CAN do something about into three categories:

Things which are essential to your well-being which you can do on your own. (If you don’t look after yourself then you won’t be able to look after others);
Things which are essential to your well-being, which you need to ask or influence others to attain;
Things which are essential to others’ well-being which you can deliver to them (whether or not they have asked).

These can include:

Ensuring you eat enough healthy food to stay fit but not fat, with, if you want, exercise;
Keeping your distance when out and wearing a face mask to assuage the concerns of others;
Really learn to appreciate yourself and potentially change the characteristics you don’t like;
Keep in remote contact with others and support them when they need in the best way you can;
Decide what you will do when this is all over and prepare yourself for it.

And finally: examine the way you communicate with other people:

Do you understand them well enough to understand how they prefer contact?
Do they understand you well enough to understand how you prefer contact?.

Always assuming you understand yourself well enough to know your own preferences.

This downtime is the lifetime opportunity to discover who you really are and what you really need. The chance to ‘be to me’.

For further discussion and remote coaching, contact us here, or, for Europe info@smartcoachingtraining.com +44 3335660067 and for Middle East hello@spsaffinity.com +97156 652 5970. Take a C-me colour profile to better understand your communication preferences..

Written by David Rigby and Martin Kubler

12/04/2020 By David Rigby

Deportment 2020: Know how to ‘talk the talk’ and ‘Zoom the Zoom’

In these days of COVID-19 you not only have to ‘talk the talk’ and ‘walk the walk’ but you have to appear good on Zoom. Not only do you have to sound good you have to look good too, And not just you – you are most likely to be working and broadcasting from home – so the view of your home must also give the right impression. I notice every one judging what you look like when you have not been able to go to the beauty salon, nail stylist, or hairdresser for weeks and having to do your own cleaning due to lockdown. Tolerance of shady presentation skills won’t be accepted for long either – so brush up those skills too!.

While you are practicing your body posture and setting up the appropriate lighting and soundscape for your broadcast, whether a serious business meeting or a chat with a distant neighbour take a look at the article below I wrote for Al Arabiya News about deportment training for some stars in the 1960’s. And note how much still applies today. Below is one of many of these articles as published in 2015.

Deportment: Know how to ‘talk the talk’ and ‘walk the walk’

It’s now the winter holiday season, and just like in the UK and USA, here in the UAE you see the girls dressed in impossible heels and wearing designers while staggering to various social venues. One difference here is that, in general, they are not freezing to death on the way to their chosen location.

They may have the designer frocks, but few of them know how to walk elegantly or indeed talk elegantly. There is an old British expression “You can take a girl out of Essex, but you can never take Essex out of the girl.”

This is because they don’t know about Deportment.

Way back in the early 1960s there was a developing record business called Motown. Based out of a house called “Hitsville USA” in Detroit. In those early days one of several vocal groups was called The Supremes. They were often known as the ‘no-hits’ Supremes as at the time every record had flopped.

But like everyone else in the Motown roster, they went to American etiquette instructor and talent agent Miss Maxine Powell to learn about deportment.

And this is what The Supremes learnt
• Perform in front of the mirror – see how you look
• Sing with a smile – not like you are in pain
• Learn how to sit on a barstool elegantly, walk stairs, get out of cars
• Always introduce yourself first, then the visitor introduce themselves
• Never see anyone for 20 minutes after a show
• Continue to grow until there is no breath in your body

In England you were taught how to handle a dazzling array of cutlery in case you went to an exclusive dinner. But the main message in all of this that you will know what to do when you meet the Queen of England.

And this is the message.

That group of three lean individuals from low grade subsidised government housing in The Brewster Projects went on to become worldwide stars. 12 number one hits in USA in three years. That was just the start.

And in 1965 they performed at Britain’s prestigious Royal Variety performance and indeed met the Queen of England.

And they knew how to conduct themselves! Years of lessons about deportment both on and off stage meant they knew exactly what to do. As did many other stars in the Motown roster which included Martha & The Vandellas, Marvin Gaye and Stevie Wonder – all megastars in their own right. I first saw Stevie Wonder perform when he was 14.

For those who don’t remember The Supremes you may know their lead singer, Diana Ross. In a recording career spanning almost 50 years she sold over 140 million records and is still performing to great reviews today while in her seventies.

But what distinguished them from the rest? In many cases they were the first black girl groups to break into the largely white supper clubs and TV shows. Sure, they can sing, but they could also put on a good show, deal with the audience and not be scared of anyone.

Why could they do this? Because they had deportment.

In the old days in Britain, the rich girls ‘came out’ (different meaning today!) after going to finishing school. They learnt how to walk in heels with a set of books balanced on their heads. These days you can record yourself, take selfies, and video yourself moving around. So observe and improve – sometimes you can’t see it yourself but a coach can help you.

Just putting someone in a posh frock and high heels doesn’t work. To again quote Margaret Thatcher: “If you have to tell people you are a lady – then you aren’t”.And all this applies in a slightly different way to the guys too!

Both need to both ‘talk the talk’ and ‘walk the walk!’

Learn all the skills before it really matters – and when time comes you can walk into the audition or job interview an unknown and come out a star!

David Rigby is a founding director of Smart Coaching & Training. He is based in Europe as an international keynote speaker, trainer, consultant, and executive coach. He developed a training practice focusing on Behavioural Preference Profiling and Signature Corporate Training suite.

09/01/2023 By David Rigby

Productivity and Wellness: Confidence, Communication, and Motivation

Productivity + Wellness = money

I am a great fan of the podcasts and programmes broadcast by BBC Radio 4 in UK. on these programmes I have noticed a great interest in the Productivity industry and the Wellness industry and how they are interconnected. To succeed in both of these, prerequisites are Confidence, Communication and Motivation. And together they can lead to collective effervescence.

Collective Effervescence

I have worked in 22 countries and accordingly the norms of behaviour are very different. Likewise I am aware that learning to communicate with people in a language is not their native one (or my native one) requires special skills. It helps to understand the constructs of their native language. Don’t assume that because someone comes from or lives in a particular country will be have in the stereotypical way. The majority of people in any country do not conform to national stereotypes and the best way of building relationships with anyone is by building cognitive diversity skills as well as intercultural skills.

Motivation is the first step

Unless you are motivated you won’t do anything. Getting motivated to get up in the morning is the first step to doing anything. Motivation leads to action and that’s the only way to get to results. Motivation can help get you better at something. Personally I struggled all my life with not speaking clearly and when I started my first job I was too shy to talk to people. I became motivated to improve my communication skills. Understanding my Cognitive Communication Profile helped me recognise that people prefer to communicate differently. I took the plunge to take public speaking classes. My confidence in speaking gradually improved, one baby step at a time.

unlease your motivation click to see more

ace your communication click to see more

confidence: strut your stuff click to see more

Confidence to speak to strangers

If you talk to a stranger at a meeting or party – what’s the worst thing that can happen? They ignore you. And you would be no worse off than if you did nothing . At best you can get a new friend, lover or work. Having the confidence to try new things, the confidence to fail and learn are skills on the road to success.

Motivation, Confidence, Communication – two ways to learn

Confidence, Communication and Motivation are fundamentals to success, to be productive and be well. We are running one day courses on all three in Morocco in March. Why not join us in the sun. See more here or click through on the icons above right. Or if not, the courses are available on line. here

At Smart Coaching & Training we have a diverse team of 20 associates in four continents speaking 11 languages. We pass the tests on diversity for sex/gender, race/ethnicity, sexuality, education, class, generation. and fail on the boring-interesting spectrum. See our associates here

10/11/2022 By David Rigby

Cognitive: the most important type of Diversity

Are you dancing? Are you asking?

What’s the difference between being asked to the dance and being asked to dance ? This is a well established and good example of explaining the difference between Diversity and Inclusion.

Go sort these women’s issues

Typically, the pale, male and stale brigade announce they have a woman or an LGBT person on the board and they are tasked with dealing with HR or other soft topics and never get asked their opinion let alone to manage with anything else as that’s straight man’s work. And it ticks all the boxes of their Diversity policy. None of the ticks in the Inclusion box.

People like me, people like us

Most organisations typically like to recruit ‘people like us’ so they wont challenge the status quo. Most individuals (and many organisations) have cognitive dissidence – not even realising that have biases let alone doing something to counter it.

You are black – therefore your politics are…

The furore about a recent ex UK prime minister’s non-white chancellor demonstrated that colour is immaterial to diversity if all about you were also educated at Eton. Another politician said , in effect , “All black people think like this (or should)”- unless they are from a privileged group and are not, or much less, oppressed. Some people think “All Spanish people behave like this”- but depending on social status or location may not. – ‘some’ Spanish people may, most probably don’t .

How many stereotypes do you belong to?

Stereotypes are the biggest disaster – for any category the majority just don’t fit because they also belong to many other types which may be more prevalent.

*David Rigby will be presenting at PSAx talks 26 November 2022 in Barcelona (see below)*

*David Rigby was an expert speaker in Jersey (UK) in Otober*

*Hear SCT associates David Rigby, Jessica Breitenfeld, Caroline Dreami, and Ian Gibbs and many other experts at this Barcelona event. – details below*

Gender and Sexuality – sorted – so we are diverse.

There are other types of diversity except gender and sexuality. And yet most of the talk is about these two. The woman’s lobby and the LGBT+etc lobbies have ensured that. And coming up a good third is Race/Ethnicity and country of origin. Is dealing with these enough ? – many organisations dont know any better.

Class, education type and education level, country of residence, age (generation), religion, culture, organisation all are different spectrums of diversity.

Neurodiversity and Worldview

And worthy of inclusion are NeuroDiversity and Worldview. Neurodiversity is used to explain the diverse ways of thinking, learning, processing and behaving. People who think differently can come up with different ideas. ADHD, Autism, Dyspraxia, Dyslexia, Dyscalculia, Dysgraphia, and Tourette’s syndrome are all examples of neurodiverse conditions.

Worldview is about values and cultural behaviours. The concept worldview usually refers to an interpretation of reality that provides an overarching framework for the constitution of the world or the cosmos. Various belief systems, religions, ideologies, and science itself are examples of worldviews that contain differing pictures of the world. All of us have different pictures – the more the pictures differ the more diverse the team. For example, the family is more important than the individual. Power is more important than doing the right thing.

Looking at different perspectives and listening to others – to make more money

The point about having a diverse and fully included team is that it looks at things from different perspectives. And research shows over and over that organisations with the most diverse teams are the most successful and profitable. Many people think they are diverse until someone challenges them with a different opinion.

Those who think logically typically take a different perspective compared with those who think emotionally. The extravert thinks differently from the introvert. Having a team or organisation with all these categories in various of the four combinations are the most powerful diverse teams you can have. This is called cognitive diversity.

Cognitive : Introvert or Extravert ? Logical or Emotional

Working with people who think and communicate the same way as you, regardless of their other diverse characteristics, will not get you the benefits of a diverse team. To get the benefits, above all, you need a team that is cognitively diverse. Just invite all the combinations both to the dance and also to dance . Read more here

At Smart Coaching & Training we have a diverse team of 20 associates in four continents speaking 11 languages. We pass the tests on diversity for sex/gender, race/ethicity, sexuality, education, class, generation. and fail on the boring-interesting spectrum. See our associates here

To attend the Professional Speakers Association (Spain) ‘s PSAx event in Barcelona on November 26th click here

24/08/2022 By David Rigby

Rubbing salt into the API wounds

Getting closer to the king

In the very old days , salt was very expensive and was used as a status symbol. At a banquet, salt would be placed in a strategic place on the long narrow tables and at the head of the table would be a very important person such as the king. The closer to the king you were the more important you were and if you were below the salt – you really were nobody.

Enabling people to take responsibility

I have fought running battles with managers and executives, particularly in the Middle East, where every tiny decision needs the signature of the boss – and I thought progress was being made. Getting over the challenges where entire peoples (such as Filipinos in Middle East; most Indians, women, and Northerners and Working Class folk in the UK) were educated to just do what they were told, know their place, and challenge nothing and certainly not to network.

Progress is being made – if you are ‘above the API’ and not if you are ‘below the API’
Today, you’re either above the API (application programming interface)or below the API. You either tell robots what to do, or are told by robots what to do.

*Below the salt: Learning English though Vaughan Systems at Belmonte Spain*

*Chess Pieces made by Alejandro Garabon in Altea Alicante It’s all black or white with API*

Psychologically safe environments

These days you are encouraged to develop your own networks and initiatives, and in theory there is the modern day leader who delegates responsibility to his team in a psychologically safe environment and allows them to experiment , to make mistakes without getting fired and above all gives them the authority to enable them make the decisions, wherever ‘the buck stops’ and your manager supported you. But only if you are above the API . While the upper and middle classes will work though ‘who you know’ it is still positively frowned upon in the working classes who will ‘get there on their own merit without help from anyone’.

Above and below the API

An example of an API is Uber. The app sends a request that includes account data, pickup and dropoff locations to drivers nearby and dispatches one to the customer to fulfil the request. The only two humans involved are the customer and the driver. The skills the drivers develop in driving are not an investment in their future. It’s a dead end job They have no opportunity to progress and no contact with management unless it all goes wrong. So there is even less opportunity than with working in a contact centre where at least you may have contact with the management. There is constant dispute with Uber and similar organisations such as Deliveroo as to whether the drivers are employed or casual It is no great surprise that the drivers are going on strike even in places where it is illegal such as Dubai. Good for them.

It knows you know (tribute to Hilda Baker)

In effect the computer (API) knows when you breathe, how long it takes to pee, as well as counting how many journeys and dinners are delivered, issues you resolve and other times how many people you can get rid of. Does it give you career progression? No. Does it allow you to develop your initiative and self-confidence? No. That’s the world of networking, negotiation, staff retention and freedom which you can get from being above the API and above the salt.

Breeding Populism and Fascism?

People being put below the API and not allowed to challenge, is ideal scenario for breeding populism and fascism. ( and could be a contributing factor to Brexit. )

At Smart Coaching & Training we are really busy teaching those above the API , matching the client to appropriate associate based on needs including location and language.

09/05/2022 By David Rigby

LEGO®Serious Play®in practice

How can I build my team?

The serious business of play can be used to help individuals and organisations resolve issues and find a way forward. Techniques such as Team Coaching and Constellations have been used for many years to enable innovative thinking to be creative outside of the conventional box. Now, you can take a box of Lego and, under guidance, use the bricks to help find a way forwards.

How can I resolve team issues?

In LEGO®Serious Play® sessions, individuals construct their own models for specific topics and learn from translating their 3D creation into words, a surprisingly insightful process, noting how different people interpret the same instructions. Many people find it easier to express their emotions through a third party or vehicle rather than talk about them directly, and having a model facilitates this. There are also opportunities to model a future by building co-operatively, to allow the quieter ones to contribute at equal level as their more assertive counterparts.

*Ian Gibbs: simple models tell great stories . Barcelona April 2022*

*One of the groups at Jessica Breitenfeld’s H2BU studio Barcelona*

How can I plan my company’s future?

In April in Barcelona, Spain, Smart Coaching & Training ran a successful event with LEGO®Serious Play Certified Practitioners, Marta Odriozola and Ian Gibbs to demonstrate how Lego Serious Play works. Participants learnt how simple small pieces of coloured plastic can be transformed into a powerful way of thinking that can cross conventional boundaries and act as a catalyst for producing ideas that were buried inside them waiting to be discovered. You can see photos of how the individuals bonded and confidently told their stories to their team members.

LEGO®Serious Play® Workshops

SCT are now proud to offer a series of three five hour workshops to complete your understanding.

You can see them here

https://www.smartcoachingtraining.com/wp-content/uploads/2022/05/LSP-Team-Strategy.pdf

https://www.smartcoachingtraining.com/wp-content/uploads/2022/05/LSP-Company-Strategy.pdf

https://www.smartcoachingtraining.com/wp-content/uploads/2022/05/LSP-Identity.pdf

See all our workshops and short courses: https://www.smartcoachingtraining.com/what_we_offer/workshops-and-short-courses

And our longer Signature Corporate Training Courses: https://www.smartcoachingtraining.com/what_we_offer/signature-corporate-training-longer-courses-and-retreats

At Smart Coaching & Training we coach and mentor according to client’s need, matching the client to appropriate associate based on needs including location and language.

01/03/2022 By Ian Gibbs

Why I’m passionate about PLS

I wasn’t the ‘brightest’ of kids at school. I was good at Art. I could keep my head above water with Maths and Science. But everything else was pretty grim and I wasn’t happy about it.

Given that my home was at the bottom of the valley and my school at the top, it’s fair to say that my educational progress was an uphill struggle every day.

Focus on what you are good at

But in spite of my academic failings, I was persuaded, for better or worse, to drop Art and continue Maths and Science at ‘A’ level, a decision helped by the fact that Close Encounters and Star Wars came out that year and the idea of working for NASA seemed like a dream worth pursuing. And that’s when something remarkable happened. I suddenly became intelligent. All those numbers, formulas and laws started to click into place. I started to get it. My capability for learning grew.

Swimming pool full of mud

My confidence grew with it so much I practically ran up that hill each day. I left school with grades good enough to get into St. Andrews (the 3rd top university at the time) to study Astrophysics. I started university with the confidence of someone who was going to devour astrophysics and graduate with a glorious first class honours.

Unfortunately it was not to be. My newfound intelligence disappeared in first term. I went through university like Usain Bolt trying to sprint through a swimming pool full of mud. It was incredibly tough and I felt I had to study twice as hard just to keep up with everyone else. I did get my degree but not what I felt reflected my efforts.

The remarkable point of this story though, isn’t about the change of my academic abilities. The remarkable point is that nobody, not my teachers, not my parents, not even myself asked the question why? Why was I intelligent during ‘A’ levels and why not before or after?’. In fact it was only 30 years later on that it occurred to me to finally ask and answer it.

Are You Intelligent or do you just have a good teacher?

The answer was to do with something that few in education talk about.

When someone does well in a subject, we either justify it by saying they have a good teacher (school, coach etc) or they’re intelligent (bright, talented etc). Few people consider the third option: their learning techniques. Or in other words the way they learn – the strategy they use to combine the resources at their disposal to learn in a way that suits them. When done correctly, a Personal Learning Strategy can make a world of difference. Yet it too often gets overlooked.

And this is a pity because whereas we can’t genetically modify our intelligence or feasibly change teachers, we can easily change our learning techniques. During A levels I inadvertently stumbled across some great learning techniques. But because I didn’t recognise them for what they were I failed to maintain them through university and thus my university studies were much more of a struggle than they needed to be. I could have sailed through my degree, but I didn’t.

This missed opportunity has left me feeling frustrated, partly for my disappointing grades, but mostly for all other students, young or not so young, who could be reaching their potential if only they knew how to put together the techniques which suit them best. Trying to change this by raising awareness of the options we have and how to develop our own personal learning strategies to become better more quickly at whatever we choose has become my driving force.

When I see the difference it can produce, it makes me feel that getting out of bed each day is worth it. It makes them feel good and it makes me feel good, too.

That is why I’m passionate about personal learning strategies.

Still Not Convinced You need to learn how to learn?

At Smart Coaching & Training we coach and mentor according to client’s need, matching the client to appropriate associate including location and language.