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26/01/2024 By David Rigby

What the butler saw

What the butler saw

Executive Assistants and Work Ethic

I have just finished listening to The Remains of the Day by Kazuo Ishiguro. In it, the protagonist Stevens, a butler, reviews his life. By putting his duty to his boss above all else he fails to support his father and wrecks the opportunity for a relationship – indeed doesn’t even recognise it. He was privy to many meetings held by his boss, significantly about the treaties after the first world war and meetings with the Germans immediately before the second world war. Never questioning the wisdom of his boss he wonders how his responsibility for the provision of the perfect cup of tea helps with the meetings .

How relevant is this for today?

An Executive Assistant appears to be similar to the role of Butler. Making sure that everything runs smoothy. Recent articles have asked whether the EA should be on the board? To me, lets say at a meeting, it depends on whether the EA is in part responsible for the outcome of the meeting. Providing input and opinion as well as ensuring the smooth running behind the scenes as it were are different responsibilities and different roles . And it depends whether the EA is paid for those different responsibilities,

1975 show of Joe Orton’s 1967 play What the butler saw

The Work Ethic

Working 72 hours per week not only ensures you are not working at your most effective at work but it can completely remove any hope of a personal life. During a coaching session for a client, we had developed a strategy for his career, and I asked what his personal goals were. He replied- to find a partner, get married etc. There was no space in his life to even build a strategy to find a partner let alone execute it. It took him ten years to find a partner.

Perfectionism and Delegation

The butler believed his standards were the only ones, and was incapable of delegation of responsibility. Complete failure to recognise what is ‘good enough’, and that there are other ways of doing the job. The ‘extra mile’ is fine every once in a while.

The Remains of the Day by Kazuo Ishiguro : the book, the film, the audio book

Getting the coffee

It was the butler’s role to provide the tea (and maybe coffee) . These days the first half hour of a meeting can be: going around the room, taking coffee orders, someone leaves the meeting to go to Star*ucks  (and therefore does not participate during that time), then there is this skill of each participant trying to remember what they ordered.  A butler could arrange this, but an Executive Assistant with responsibilities couldn’t because they need to be present. (Personally, as I am in Spain I would insist on a proper coffee from a local café , thereby extending the ‘coffee’ process).

The Remains of the day

In the novel, this refers to how much of your life is left, and the things you might regret

  • Spending too long at the office
  • Not building up connections and lifelong friendships nothing to do with work
  • Not getting a life or even organising a life
  • Not getting too many responsibilities and if you do, making sure you are paid
  • Not finding space to reflect, learning new stuff, changing your strategy.

Gen x/z and the 35 hour week

My Mother always said that if you can’t do your job in 35 hours a week then you are incompetent or in the wrong job .  The butler’s only life was his work.

It used to be: you clocked off your work after 8 hours and clocked back in the next day.  Technology, flexible working and working from home meant being always available, a slave to your job.  So welcome back the 35 hour week and not being always available. And eat the remains of your dinner while it still hot and have a proper Spanish two hour lunch break

It’s your misguided choice to work 72 hours a week, therefore doing someone else out of a job as well as wrecking your own life, . Just don’t expect others to do so. And remember this lifestyle is YOUR CHOICE. Smart Coaching & Training’s coaches can help you get a balanced life .

Smart Coaching & Training works with 20 associates, in four continents speaking 12 languages and raised and working in a wide range of cultures. See our associates here.

“What the butler saw” is also a play by Joe Orton

Written by David Rigby © 2024 Smart Coaching & Training Ltd

Filed Under: Authoritarianism, Being Confident, coaching, Emotional Intelligence, hospitality, leadership, Mindset, Mother, New year's resolutions, Personal Development, Presence, Soft Skills, Wellbeing, You and Your Career Tagged With: Executive Assistance, intuitive, keeping tradition, laughter, performing, Smart Coaching & Training, The Remains of the day

11/01/2024 By David Rigby

Enjoying Interculturality

Enjoying Interculturality

Being fully present in multiple cultures simultaneously

Many people find intercultural encounters scary as they are frightened of doing or saying the wrong thing. Gaining experience of different cultures and people can help with your confidence. Knowing your own culture – its benefits and pitfalls – is essential. Being aware of the cultural behaviours of the other cultures you maybe encountering is also useful.

The Christmas period

I live in Spain. During the Christmas period (and for me that’s what it’s called) I had the pleasure of seeing my Argentinean friends and experiencing again how they celebrate Noche Buena (Christmas Eve) with lots of meat well into the night. My guests of the period were my former lodger from Antigua and his mother.  I took them for a very British Traditional Christmas lunch on the seafront at Benidorm where it was warm enough to sit outside.

Hombre G 40th anniversary intergenerational concert

The in-between Period

On the 28th I was fortunate to be invited to a rock concert in a stadium in Madrid. The 40th anniversary concert of the Spanish Band “Hombres G”. Witnessing how middle aged Spanish (therefore Intercultural and Intergenerational) behave: standing up for 2.5 hours singing all the words.

New year Period

Noche Vieja (New years eve) was spent with a traditional Spanish dinner. The next few days were spent in Madrid with one of my best friends from Dubai. We had great fun trying (and succeeding) to find Pork-free and Alcohol-free food on Spanish Menus. Fortunately as part of my personal intercultural training I know my way very well around Spanish Menus. Fortunately also, my other friends and I didn’t feel the need to exclude ourselves from indulging in both, indeed we were encouraged.

Roscon for Reyes,, typical Spanish food, Indian food in Spain, British Christmas lunch

The Reyes (three kings) period

On the night of the 5th of January the Spanish leave a shoe by the Christmas tree in the hope of receiving gifts from The Three Kings. This is why the sales in Spain start January 7 rather than December 26 in UK. There is a traditional cake called a Roscon which is a sweet bread-based ring-shaped dessert which is eaten on January 6th. So we had to abandon eating the British Mince Pies with Brandy Butter for two days to focus on the Roscon. It was great to experience Spanish Epiphany Mass in a village church.

Celebrating Interculturality

None of this would have been possible without the effort made to know people from different cultures, and understand their cultures and also introduce them to mine.
I had a great time because I knew what I was doing, was proud of my own culture and took the time to learn about others. Rather than taking the safe middle ground for fear of upsetting, this was enjoying one’s own and other traditions to the full. You can also do this . Read more here

Smart Coaching & Training works with 20 associates, in four continents speaking 12 languages and raised and working in a wide range of cultures. See our associates here.

Written by David Rigby © 2024 Smart Coaching & Training Ltd

Filed Under: Being Confident, Emotional Intelligence, hospitality, leadership, Mindset, New year's resolutions, Personal Development, Wellbeing Tagged With: Christmas, intuitive, keeping tradition, laughter, NewYearsEve, Noche Bueno, performing, Reyes, Smart Coaching & Training

11/09/2021 By David Rigby

Would you rather improve your competence or transform your mindset?

Would you rather improve your competence or transform your mindset?

Do you focus on task or focus on people?


Corporations that help their executives and leadership teams examine their personal world views can reap rich rewards in terms of effective cultural transformation and engaging the younger generation. Organisational Managers have two broad options in how to use their authority to serve the organisation at any given time. They can perceive themselves to be in a managerial mode delivering today’s outcomes within the relative ‘certainty’ of the system as it currently exists and operates or else by stepping back into an uncertain big picture mode of leadership of the future. Their daily performance necessarily combines both operational management of today’s needs along with a more strategic leadership role focused on tomorrow’s needs.

The voyage from Manager to Leader

The voyage of development ‘from manager to leader’ is not an easy one; some people change little during their lifetimes while others substantially.

Spiral Dynamics and Vertical Development

Those willing to work at developing themselves and becoming more self-aware can almost certainly evolve over time into truly transformational leaders. .

Are you on a ‘Heroes Journey’?

For the future world emerging, the higher stages of consciousness are being called forth dramatically, with the younger generation coming in at levels far higher than their bosses, creating new tensions in the corporate cultures. Note consciousness is very different from intelligence. Few current leaders are desiring to change the world for the worlds sake however many want to progress on their ‘Heroes Journey’.

We advise and sell many preference profiling tools such as DISC and C-me to help you improve your competence.

Spiral Dynamics


With Psychosocial Adult Development approaches such as Leadership Development Framework  and Spiral Dynamics  adults start at level one and can progress through a number of levels. The closer you are to the higher levels of consciousness the more able you will be to effect and deliver on change, be an effective director and manage internationally.
.

https://www.smartcoachingtraining.com/what_we_offer/signature-corporate-training-longer-courses-and-retreatsPsychosocial Adult Development Training

Each stage can be regarded as a level of awareness or consciousness and forms the psychological basis for a critical perception of why we act in a certain way.  We can help leaders become better leaders by helping them transform from one level to the next.

To find out more check out our course “Transformational Leadership using Psychosocial Adult Development Strategy ” This is just one of our Signature Corporate Training courses. see then all here . Or simply just ask us at [email protected]

Written by David Rigby, © 2021 Smart Coaching & Training Ltd

Filed Under: Being Confident, Communication, Emotional Intelligence, Global teams, leadership, Management, Mentoring, Mindset, News, People Development, Personal Development, spiral dynamics, vertical development, Wellbeing Tagged With: Jung, logical, manager to leader, operational management, spiral Dynamics, thinking, Vertical Adult Development

26/08/2020 By David Rigby

The Mindful Flâneur

The Mindful Flâneur

how to get the most of travelling

Valencia

In Old Town

    London

    St Pancras Station

      Vienna

      Where Beethoven lived

        This year, because of COVID, many of you will be forced to take your holidays closer to home. Here is an opportunity to know your home country. Instead of sitting on a beach, queueing for museums and socially distancing in the same shop in a different location why not be a traveller and really get to know somewhere. And excellent way to absorb a city is to be a Mindful Flâneur.

        The term flâneur comes from the French masculine noun flâneur—which has the basic meanings of “stroller”, “lounger”, “saunterer”, “loafer”—which itself comes from the French verb flâner, which means “to stroll”. To me a Flâneur is a person who wanders without a destiny within, especially, a city to observe the buildings, people and the general environment.

        Mindfulness or being mindful is being ‘in the moment’, totally focussed, observing everything and not being judgemental.  So a mindful flâneur really can get the most of ‘just wandering about’ provided they are organised ‘just enough’.

        An  invitation to

        change a habit /way of being in order to appreciate the world

        Alicante

        Old Town

          Manchester

          University In the winter

            Vienna

            Covid Rabbit

              While ‘flâneuring’ is ‘just wandering about’ planning can make the experience more joyful and profitable use of time. Try these:
              • Research to know which areas might have hidden secrets and watering holes. These are often older areas. Don’t make restaurant reservations – you don’t want a time critical destiny.
              • Travelling with minimum baggage – preferably none.
              • As you are venturing into the unknown, potentially you could arrive in risky areas. So leave your wallet behind. Take some money, one credit card, and maybe evidence of who you are in case you need emergency medical assistance, and tell someone where you are going.
              • Dress appropriately. Don’t attract muggers and robbers. No Jewellery no expensive watches. Dress downmarket – but you may meet interesting people so don’t look like a vagrant either. Take with you a sun hat and an umbrella. And layers of clothes you can put on or take off

              Be a flâneur not a tourist.

              The assumption is you are walking. Difficult to be a flaneur in a car. No need to tick off the places you have researched. You are mindfully observing the mundane.
              Be mindful. “In the moment” means taking in and being part of the events in the street, where you can:
              • Note the Street names. They may be historical, may be in two languages, such as English/Welsh or Catalan/Castellano, and they may point you in the direction of historic churches. The street furniture and paving are also clues to the history.
              • Guess when properties were built. Look at balconies, outside decoration.

              Many older properties descended into potential ruin in the 1960s and now have been gentrified so only the rich can live there.
              You can also take local refreshment in local cafes. Avoid the familiar such as Costa, Starbucks, McDonalds. They are often a triumph of marketing over quality. See what the locals are offering.
              • Look at the nationalities of the food and compare with the nationalities of those who are serving and preparing. And see if there are locals in there.
              • Look at the decoration – may not have been refurbished in years. For me I prefer tea in ancient tea rooms and coffee in modern establishments. Do they use loose tea and don’t use coffee pods?
              • Take your time and talk to people – you never know where your next friend or offer of work is coming from. Look at their behaviours, language, voice tone and match it.

              Behavioural Preference Profile

              Ultimately how you do this will depend on your characteristics based on your behavioural preference profile.

              Cyprus

              Nicosia Border

                Avila

                What crate shall I chose?

                  Liverpool

                  In Penny Lane, there is a barber showing photographs….

                    Most people have behavioural characteristics based on all the colours, usually one prevails.
                    Your behaviour based on your main colour is likely to be
                    • Red: Cover a great distance and not look at anything in detail. Be more interested in the buildings than the people.
                    • Blue: Possibly develop a detailed itinerary and follow it exactly – not being a flâneur at all.
                    • Green: Cover a small distance looking at the people and their lifestyles and wondering how they feel.
                    • Yellow: The distance covered will depend on how many people you meet and chat with on route!

                    Remember that you are not on a marathon or an endurance test, so stop when you have enough and keep an eye about where you are relatively to the bus and metro stops to help you return. Enjoy!

                    Written by David Rigby

                    © 2020 Smart Coaching & Training Ltd 


                    Ultimately how you do this will depend on your characteristics based on your behavioural preference profile. Most people have behavioural characteristics based on all the colours, usually one prevails.
                    Your behaviour based on your main colour is likely to be
                    • Red: Cover a great distance and not look at anything in detail. Be more interested in the buildings than the people.
                    • Blue: Possibly develop a detailed itinerary and follow it exactly – not being a flâneur at all.
                    • Green: Cover a small distance looking at the people and their lifestyles and wondering how they feel.
                    • Yellow: The distance covered will depends on how many people you meet and chat with on route!
                    Remember that you are not on a marathon or an endurance test, so stop when you have enough and keep an eye about where you are relatively to the bus and metro stops to help you return. Enjoy!

                    An  invitation to

                    change a habit /way of being in order to appreciate the world

                    Alicante

                    Old Town

                      Vienna

                      Danube

                        Vienna

                        Covid Rabbit

                          While ‘flâneuring’ is ‘just wandering about’ planning can make the experience more joyful and profitable use of time. Try these:
                          • Research to know which areas might have hidden secrets and watering holes. These are often older areas. Don’t make restaurant reservations – you don’t want a time critical destiny.
                          • Travelling with minimum baggage – preferably none.
                          • As you are venturing into the unknown, potentially you could arrive in risky areas. So leave your wallet behind. Take some money, one credit card, and maybe evidence of who you are in case you need emergency medical assistance, and tell someone where you are going.
                          • Dress appropriately. Don’t attract muggers and robbers. No Jewellery no expensive watches. Dress downmarket – but you may meet interesting people so don’t look like a vagrant either. Take with you a sun hat and an umbrella. And layers of clothes you can put on or take off.

                          Filed Under: Being Confident, C-me Colour Profiling, Communication, leadership, Motivation, Personal Development, Uncategorized, Wellbeing Tagged With: Cyprus, Flaneur, Liverpool, London, Manchester, mindful, Tourist, Travel, Valencia, Vienna

                          11/04/2020 By Halina Jaroszewska

                          Becoming the leader you want to be

                          Becoming the leader you want to be

                          Expectations of leaders and aspiring leaders in business today have never been higher and the demands on them never been greater.

                          What are these expectations and demands and how can senior executives get the support they need?

                          First … there is the sheer volume of work: significant number of tasks to accomplish and vast swathes of information to filter. Emails, phone calls, meetings, travel, conferences, presentations, reports, 24-hour connectivity; it’s not surprising if senior executives become exhausted.

                          Second … the pace of change and the levels of uncertainty surrounding business decisions have never been higher. Executives who are used to striving for specific, measurable goals may not be so great at handling the ambiguity and fluidity that rapidly changing situations can bring.

                          Third … where companies used to run on a simple top-down command and control basis, it is now widely recognised that the best businesses are those that harness creativity, innovation and entrepreneurship. The most effective leaders are those that participate in, encourage and manage collaborative teams.

                          Fourth … leaders and aspiring leaders play a crucial role in engagement. The Chartered Institute of Personnel and Development (CIPD) defines engagement as “feeling positive about your job, as well as being prepared to go the extra mile and do the best of your ability.”

                          Not surprisingly, engagement is linked to a wide range of positive outcomes. Two important drivers are for people to have opportunities to feed their views upwards and to feel well informed about what is happening in their organization. But a key driver of engagement is for people to think their leaders – especially their manager or line manager – is committed to the organization and cares about them.

                          Fifth … a major study by Watson Wyatt:Connecting Organisational Communication to Financial Performance found that “a significant improvement in communication effectiveness is associated with a 29.5 per cent increase in market value.” Once again, it’s the leader who needs to be communicating.

                          So, leaders face a greater work load; a more challenging, fluid and ambiguous business environment than ever before; are key drivers in employee engagement, and their effective communication skills and their ability to harness the creativity and entrepreneurship of their teams is essential if the business is to succeed. It’s not surprising that some leaders and aspiring leaders lose focus or wonder if they are doing a good job.

                          It’s not surprising that some leaders and aspiring leaders lose focus or wonder if they are doing a good job. In Development Dimensions International’s Global Leadership Forecast 2011 only 38% of the 12,423 senior executives participating in the study reported the level of leadership in their organization as ‘good’ or ‘excellent.’

                          However, the positive news for leaders and aspiring leaders is that help is available and that companies want to invest in supporting their leaders and aspiring leaders.

                          The Value of Executive Coaching

                          A DMB study in connection with the Human Capital Institute on emerging practices in executive coaching suggests that organizations are planning to increase their investment in supporting leaders and aspiring leaders in several key areas. Specifically, by helping capable executives reach higher performance, and in supporting high potential executives. Similarly, coaching is seen as having the greatest impact when it is used to groom high potential executives and help high potential executives achieve higher performance, rather then for remedial purposes.

                          For those respondents who measured the financial impact of coaching, 77% estimated the ROI on coaching to be at least equal to the investment. Some respondents reported the ROI on coaching to be as high as 500%. An earlier study by the International Professional Management Association found that training plus coaching was four times more effective than training alone.

                          It will pay dividends for any leader or aspiring leader who wants to fulfill their potential and deliver real benefit to their business to make a solid case for the value of executive coaching. While you are making the case for your organization to invest in executive coaching to support you in challenging times, here are a few hints and tips to keep you on track

                          • Think about what is most important to you. Not what you do but how you behave. In a tough business environment staying true to your values will give you a guiding star on which to base decisions and choose priorities.
                          • Leadership is about values and behaviour – not about having all the solutions. Establish end goals and empower your team to come up with solutions – this will open up far more opportunities and motivate your team.
                          • Keep communicating. Explain your thinking and keep up an ongoing narrative with your team about the progress towards your goals. Remember any good story has ups and downs, so don’t be afraid to admit to adversity.
                          • Be consistent. If you set up new initiatives or new ways of doing things – especially if they relate to communication or team empowerment – then keep them going. Show real leadership qualities and stay steady regardless of set-backs.
                          • Be decisive. Far more damage is done to businesses by delaying decisions than by taking wrong decisions. If you find yourself unable to take a decision ask what additional information you need to make the decision. If that information is not available then staying true to your values will help make a decision.
                          • Remember 80% is good enough. Whatever the task, if its 80% good enough, sign it off and move on. Striving for perfection, or taking on too many tasks because only you can do them well enough is a recipe for bottlenecks, frustration, stress and lack of achievement.
                          • Flip negative to positive. When facing a set-back, make a conscious effort to look at the opportunities that a challenging situation presents you with, rather than just the problems. The results may surprise you.
                          • Focus on your team rather than yourself. If you focus on supporting your people and enabling them to improve their performance in tough times, you will find you are more likely to reach overall goals and less likely run into self- absorption and lack of focus.
                          • Be open to learning. Setting out to learn something new, to expand your knowledge or skills is life-enhancing, confidence-boosting and can have a positive effect on other aspects of your performance. Don’t close down in reaction to adversity; open up.

                          And finally I have no hesitation in repeating point 1 because it is so important …

                          1. Think about what is most important to you. Not what you do but how you behave. In a tough business environment staying true to your values will give you a guiding star on which to base decisions and choose priorities.

                          Halina Jaroszewska is an Executive Coach, professionally certified by the International Coach Federation. Halina helps leaders and aspiring leaders to turn uncertainty into a powerful tool for change and growth. Her aim is to enable clients to take their success to the next level, switch surviving into thriving, and maximise their potential during challenging times

                          Filed Under: coaching, Communication, Emotional Intelligence, Growing your Business, leadership, Management, Mentoring, People Development, Personal Development, Training Tagged With: executive coaching, leadership training

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