Personal Development Archives - Page 14 of 16 - Smart Coaching and Training

01/08/2018 By Isla Baliszewska

Do we need a Nudge?

Everyone has those moments when they really wish they had made a different decision…or actually just done something they perhaps should have.

Welcome Nudge Theory, which is about making it easier for people to make decisions which are in their best interest. Thank you Richard Thaler and Cass Sunstein for the book ‘Nudge’, published in 2008. And well done Richard Thaler for winning the Nobel Prize for Economics in 2017.

Most of us think of a nudge as a little prompt needed to get something done. Which it is, and those nudges can be the difference between something happening and nothing happening. Coming from behavioural economics, Nudge Theory takes this further, considering important biases in human decision-making and positing ways to help people make decisions that would benefit them.

“By knowing how people think, we can make it easier for them to choose what is best for them, their families and society.” wrote Richard Thaler and Cass Sunstein, authors of ‘Nudge: Improving Decisions about Health, Wealth and Happiness.

Simple example: on the assumption that most people want to be healthier but for many reasons (lack of willpower, lack of availability of healthy foods, sweets at the check-out), they stay unhealthy. The nudge here would be to fill the shops with only healthy products, improve food labelling to provide health information, replace the check out sweets with fruit and nuts. The objective – to encourage shoppers to make healthier choices.

Or, you want to go running every day but you can’t be bothered. Just put your trainers where your feet will hit the floor when you swing them out of bed. Your thought process is more likely to veer from procrastination to action.

Nudge Theory has become popular with politicians and policy makers as it touches on important biases in our decision-making processes. From a societal perspective, if you can encourage a whole bunch of people to engage in behaviours that improve society, that sounds like a good idea.

David Cameron’s Behavioural Insights team used the Nudge Theory concept when adding an invitation to join the organ donor register when people were renewing their car tax. This little nudge resulted in a massive increase in people joining the register. Barack Obama had Cass Sunstein as an adviser on his team with the goal of bringing the US Government “into the 21st century in a wide range of ways”. One of these was to try and increase the honesty of quarterly sales reports submitted by providers of goods and services to the Federal Government. By adding a brief prompt at the top of the online form, more accurate information was submitted leading to a reported $1.59 million increase in fees in one quarter, supposedly reflecting more honesty in sales figures. All good news for society as a whole.

But what about nudging to help us as individuals? Nudge Theory demonstrates that using quite simple prompts and techniques can bring a subtle change in our responses. It can push us into taking action rather than not doing anything. But, and here’s the interesting part, it won’t work if we think we are being told what to do. So those policy making examples needed to be suggestive and inviting rather than perjorative.

For our own personal nudges to work we need to feel ownership of them, and to find things that are easy to do. Here are our Nudging Tips:

[i type=”icon-ok” color=”icon-blue” bg=””]Make it simple – so you don’t have to think before doing

[i type=”icon-ok” color=”icon-blue” bg=””]When setting your nudge try thinking of the pain/negative that you will be moving away from

[i type=”icon-ok” color=”icon-blue” bg=””]Don’t expect it to last forever – renew your nudges by introducing different ones

[i type=”icon-ok” color=”icon-blue” bg=””]Use reminders – pop post-it notes in the places where you want the behaviour change to happen. Or send yourself a morning email reminder.

[i type=”icon-ok” color=”icon-blue” bg=””]Give yourself a reward once you have ‘done’ the new nudged behaviour or task a set number of times.

[i type=”icon-ok” color=”icon-blue” bg=””]Share the nudge – tap into the power of peer pressure to make the nudge work for you.

To explore how to set your own nudges and what changes you want these nudges to make in your life, how about your first simple step being to get in touch with us – you’d be surprised what you might be able to do!

Isla Baliszewska – [email protected]

06/07/2018 By Isla Baliszewska

Creating Your Own Village – making the right connections

Spanish Translation Here

Recent research has revealed there are two major contributors to a longer life. These are:

[i type=”icon-ok” color=”icon-blue” bg=””]Close relationships – having a few people you can rely on.

[i type=”icon-ok” color=”icon-blue” bg=””]Social Integration – how much we interact with people during the day.

There is a village in Sardinia with one of the highest records for longevity. With its close knit streets, and everyone being near everyone else, people cannot help but interact. Old people tend to live with their families, where there are children of all ages, some even in their 70’s. Social interaction and integration are elemental parts of life in this village.

Saying hello to your neighbour, to the person who serves you coffee, smiling to the supermarket checkout assistant, playing card games with friends or strangers can all make a difference, and you can do this anywhere. You don’t have to be in a Sardinian village. Or, of course, you can choose not to do these things… and potentially die younger.

Statistics indicate that women generally live longer than men. Part of this is attributed to the fact that women tend to bond more easily and will talk about difficult intimacies, more so than men. Men tend to avoid ‘sensitive’ subjects and instead will bond on more generalised topics like football, or in places of mutual activity, the gym or the office meeting. In the competitive world of business, men give most of their attention to their work and career progression, and often tend to lack the skills required to meet non business colleagues or to know what to talk to them about other than those ‘comfortable’ subjects – sports, politics, cars. Of course this is a stereotype, however it is still very prevalent in our modern day society of equality. Women are the ones who tend to share, talk, have close collaborative relationships, long lasting, trusted friends with whom they have those deep conversations about all sorts of ‘stuff’. It’s all about connecting.

And then there is that other disassociative thing that we all do now. For the younger generations (and some of us older ones too), the evidence is that social media is no substitute for face to face encounters, that precious social interaction which releases oxytocin and cortisone and gives us a better chance of achieving that longer life.

Something to think about

Too many of us focus on short term work goals, and very of us few choose to decide what kind of life we want to live and to develop the personal goals to match until it’s far too late. How many times have you heard someone say, when asked why they do the job they do, something like “Well it just happened/ seemed like a good idea/ suited my skills / people said I should or would be good at it”? How difficult it is for us to pin point when we made actual choices in our lives? When do we think about the way our relationships and interactions impact on our choices and what we do?

What can we do?

[i type=”icon-ok” color=”icon-blue” bg=””]Check who around you is really there for you, without their own personal agenda and connect deeply with those who are.

[i type=”icon-ok” color=”icon-blue” bg=””]Be aware of how you are interacting – social media is all very well, as long as balanced with the healthier types of genuine face-to-face interaction.

[i type=”icon-ok” color=”icon-blue” bg=””]Ditch the detractors – those who always seem to have a reason why you shouldn’t be who you are, do what you want, make your own choices.

[i type=”icon-ok” color=”icon-blue” bg=””]Focus on your personal goals and your futures, not just on the immediate issues. This will help you prepare the skills and give you the confidence needed for developing the right networks and making the right connections.

[i type=”icon-ok” color=”icon-blue” bg=””]Try some Developmental Coaching – an intentional process to increase awareness and perspective. By growing your awareness, focus, and perspective, you will become increasingly able to decide and meet your own goals and live the life you want to live. This amalgam of life coaching, mentoring, executive coaching might be the first small step to a brighter well-connected future with your own great village.

David Rigby – July 2018

David has worked and lived in 22 countries, and has built good long term relationships and social face to face interactions in many of them. Arrange a face to face or Skype Development Coaching session to help you find your way forward to creating your own village.

24/02/2017 By Isla Baliszewska

Stories within stories within stories: Roles within roles within roles

What are your stories and roles? It’s surprising what you

hear when you truly listen

see when you really look

know when you bravely open your intuitive memory

understand when you set free your mind.

How can you lean-in to take your place in the story? What boldness that has genius and magic in it might you use to take your place in the story? By employing gratitude as a valued member of the team how could that make a contribution? Unless you are actually in the story it is nigh impossible to influence the content and direction of the story.

“Tell a story. Make it true. Make it compelling. And make it relevant.” ― Rand Fishkin, Founder of Moz

Every individual, every team, every organisation is a story and tells a story. Every individual, every team, every organisation is a system and being a system every part of that system no matter how miniscule no matter how huge has impact, influence, inspiration on the whole system. What is the story to be told, the outcome to achieve? What would be the evidence and most importantly how would you recognise the evidence? There are stories and roles wrapped up in everyone and every organisation.

Time to stop underestimating the influence of random acts of kindness; time to introduce a cultural realignment to look for what works well and what could work even better; time to let go of blame, of guilt, of getting it wrong, of exclusion, of assumptions, of un-appreciation; time to celebrate experimenting, exploring and engaging. Time to appreciate the benefit of movement, of momentum … every system needs to be kept in good condition in order to operate effectively and efficiently. Time to be agile, adaptive, appreciative; time to learn and move on by building positively, proactively and perceptively. Healthy systems indulge in exercise in all senses – physically, emotionally, spiritually which currently is embodied in the practice of mindfulness.

What are the skills that really matter? Peter Cheese Chief Executive of the Chartered Institute of Personnel and Development (CIPD), delivered a lecture entitled “Future of work and organisations” as part of the UWE Distinguished Address Series February 2017 was clear that soft skills are the ones that really matter. He shared that with only 2 in 5 employees working at peak performance the UK has one of the worst skills mismatch in the world!

What is the place in the story of the 5 R’s – resilience, robustness, reflectiveness, resourcefulness, responsibility?

Find out about how our Signature Soft Skills Workshops can support your 5 R’s.

Halina Jaroszewska – 2017

31/01/2017 By Isla Baliszewska

Leadership – ‘C-me’ Style

Leadership C-me style

It is so easy to slot into ‘this must be me’, to believe in the stereotype, to accept the personality type designated, default to what is expected, to become the mistress or master of illusion with ‘Once I …. then I will’ ….. rather than to survey the landscape and what lives there and ask

What will suit this best?

What is working well?

What could work even better?

How can I, as a leader, work with the actual material rather than wish it were different?

How to create the climate to significantly improve the landscape?

How willing am I as a leader to put ‘me’ on one side and step into the shoes of the other – to discover what the landscape of the organisation / team / board / department looks like from that perspective?

How willing am I to listen?

How willing am I to use my preferences to understand others preferences?’

C-me Colour profiling describes characteristics of the 4 colour preferences as follows:

Logical and analytical – Enjoys problem solving – Needs time for reflection – Realistic – Sorts out the details – Strong sense of duty – Structured and disciplined

Bold and determined – Confident and optimistic – Enjoys stretching goals – Leads from the front – Sets a winning mentality – Thinks big – Direct and to the point

Considerate and caring – Genuine concern for colleagues –Avoids conflict -Involves others in decisions – Respects others values – Supportive and loyal – Works for a democratic solution

Free spirited – Friendly and optimistic – Generous and open-minded – Inspirational and visionary – Looks on the bright side – Positive outlook – Spontaneous and imaginative

Each colour has its positive and least positive attributes. Each colour is perfect for whatever one wants to achieve providing one is prepared to shift perspective in order to see or recognise it.

For example, every leader needs to be able, agile, appreciative of when to call on the strength of a particular colour preference. Within C-me’s repertoire, which provides the natural and adapted or learned personas, the savvy leader has all the information at their finger-tips to decide or choose which preference or combination of preferences to use in a particular situation.

Coming clean about most effective and least effective ways to communicate is a great place to start. Want to find out more about C-me? Click here.

The elegance, the beauty, the magic of a personality profile is this: you are telling you who, what, how, why you are you? This is especially so if C-me Colour Profiling is used as it reveals preferences, gives insights into one’s natural and adapted or learned persona, provides clarity, challenges assumptions and provokes development potential.

C-me also highlights hidden potential – perfect for identifying routes to succession planning. It alludes to unique pairings of traits not usually recognised. C-me gives leaders both valuable information for their leadership development potential as well as that of colleagues and the competitive edge when dealing with clients and stakeholders, internal and external. Simply it is because knowing oneself better enables one to be more perceptive and insightful around others.

C-me gives an exclusive gift of vulnerability by virtue of the wealth of information it provides enabling a deeper level of honesty and trust to develop and engage with.

It sets the scene for high standards.

It’s a disruptor of the status quo.

Try It!

Halina Jaroszewska

05/01/2017 By Isla Baliszewska

Commitment vs resolutions – looking backwards to look forwards

Commitment vs resolutions

‘Until one is committed there is hesitancy, the chance to draw back, always ineffectiveness …’

What transforms resolutions into actions? Is there a magic ingredient?

The popular tradition of making New Year resolutions has some of its origins in Ancient Babylon and Rome. The Babylonians would typically return farm equipment that they had borrowed during the year, while in Caesar’s time Janus became the symbol for resolutions because he had two faces that could look to the past and into the future.

The early Christians believed the first day of the New Year should be spent reflecting on past mistakes and resolving to improve oneself in the New Year. There is something about entering ‘into’ the New Year that has appealed to the people throughout the world and over the centuries, as a time for: considering new beginnings, doing things ‘right’ from this new day forward and setting out towards self-improvements.

‘Making resolutions is a cleansing ritual of self-assessment and repentance that demands personal honesty and, ultimately, reinforces humility. Breaking them is part of the cycle.’ Eric Zorn

Many people look forward to the New Year for a new start on old habits. And so it continues today as we make New Year resolutions to try and improve some aspect of ourselves in the coming year. We all get into the swing of things around the start of the year making resolutions that more often than not gradually fizzle out as the year gets underway. ‘A new year resolution is something that goes in one year and out the other.’ Anon

However it still continues to be a tradition to make resolutions as the New Year begins. Mark Twain offers this perspective … ‘New year’s Day …. now is the accepted time to make your regular annual good resolutions. Next week you can begin paving hell with them as usual.’ In fact we often ask family, friends, colleagues what resolutions they are going to make. We often proudly announce the resolutions we are going to make. How often do we remember the ones from last year and challenge the resolution maker regarding a re-run in which nothing has changed during the past 12 months. They all sound good … but do they become good in reality? In fact, a recent study found that 22% of people give up on their resolution in the first week and by the end of March more than half of New Year resolvers have fallen off the bandwagon. Oscar Wilde declared that ‘Good resolutions are simply cheques that men draw on a bank where they have no account.’

So back to the dictionary to check what resolution actually means! And with thanks to dictionary.com … Resolution is from the Latin resolution, resolution – from resolvere meaning ‘to loosen or dissolve again,’ (re- + solver) which was the original meaning of resolve. The meaning ‘to determine or decide upon a course of action, etc.’ was first used in English around 1523. Interesting how the meanings of words subtly change over time.

So how does commitment fit into the picture? Has it a place in the drama that is called resolution? Well … in the words of Goethe ‘Whatever you can do or dream you can, Begin it. Boldness has genius, magic and power in it. Begin it now!’ And to continue the quote, created by WH Murray, that began this article ‘Concerning all acts of initiative and creation there is one elementary truth the ignorance of which kills countless ideas and splendid plans: that the moment one definitely commits oneself, then Providence moves too. All sorts of things occur to help one that would never otherwise have occurred. A whole stream of events issues from the decision, raising in one’s favour all manner of unforeseen incidents and meetings and material assistance which no man or woman could have dreamed would have come their way.’

Merriam Webster Online dictionary describes commitment as ‘an agreement or pledge to do something in the future; especially: an engagement to assume a financial obligation at a future date b: something pledged c: the state or an instance of being obligated or emotionally impelled <a commitment to a cause>.’ Interesting how there is a formal element implied.

R + C + A = SR

Resolution (determine or decide) + Commitment (agreement, pledge, obligation) + Action = Successful Result.

How would it be if on the last stroke of midnight from Big Ben, not only did you declare your resolution/s but also made a commitment to yourself to take the first step towards a successful result this time? What would be the impact if you only made resolutions regarding things that truly touched your heart this time? If you not only declared them but also wrote them down with a date attached this time, how might that change your perspective? Who could you be if you always walked your talk? If you took R + C + A = SR into all areas of your life throughout the year how might that make a difference? If you only made resolutions, agreements, promises that were I alignment with your values what shift might that make possible?

Take a moment to consider this: if the resolutions you share in a moment of euphoria on New Year’s Eve or at the start of the year actually had a legal dimension attached to them, which would you still go for and which would you drop like hot potatoes?

You can also check out your R + C + A = SR by using a scale of 1 to 10 where 1 is highly unlikely and 10 is absolutely no question. You can also make your best guess as to which will stay the course.

The crucial aspect of this is to invite yourself to be your best success of the year. Begin it now! Let us help!

(first published January 2009 in Lloyds Banking Group’s The Sales Professional)

Halina Jaroszewska, PCC ICF Executive Development | Discovering the difference | Exploring Potential

Do we need a Nudge?

Creating Your Own Village – making the right connections

Stories within stories within stories: Roles within roles within roles

Leadership – ‘C-me’ Style

Leadership C-me style

Commitment vs resolutions – looking backwards to look forwards

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