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12/04/2020 By David Rigby

Deportment 2020: Know how to ‘talk the talk’ and ‘Zoom the Zoom’

Deportment 2020: Know how to ‘talk the talk’ and ‘Zoom the Zoom’

In these days of COVID-19 you not only have to ‘talk the talk’ and ‘walk the walk’ but you have to appear good on Zoom. Not only do you have to sound good you have to look good too, And not just you – you are most likely to be working and broadcasting from home – so the view of your home must also give the right impression. I notice every one judging what you look like when you have not been able to go to the beauty salon, nail stylist, or hairdresser for weeks and having to do your own cleaning due to lockdown. Tolerance of shady presentation skills won’t be accepted for long either – so brush up those skills too!.

While you are practicing your body posture and setting up the appropriate lighting and soundscape for your broadcast, whether a serious business meeting or a chat with a distant neighbour take a look at the article below I wrote for Al Arabiya News about deportment training for some stars in the 1960’s. And note how much still applies today. Below is one of many of these articles as published in 2015.

walking the walk

Deportment: Know how to ‘talk the talk’ and ‘walk the walk’

It’s now the winter holiday season, and just like in the UK and USA, here in the UAE you see the girls dressed in impossible heels and wearing designers while staggering to various social venues. One difference here is that, in general, they are not freezing to death on the way to their chosen location.

It’s now the winter holiday season, and just like in the UK and USA, here in the UAE you see the girls dressed in impossible heels and wearing designers while staggering to various social venues. One difference here is that, in general, they are not freezing to death on the way to their chosen location.

They may have the designer frocks, but few of them know how to walk elegantly or indeed talk elegantly. There is an old British expression “You can take a girl out of Essex, but you can never take Essex out of the girl.”

This is because they don’t know about Deportment.

Way back in the early 1960s there was a developing record business called Motown. Based out of a house called “Hitsville USA” in Detroit. In those early days one of several vocal groups was called The Supremes. They were often known as the ‘no-hits’ Supremes as at the time every record had flopped.

But like everyone else in the Motown roster, they went to American etiquette instructor and talent agent Miss Maxine Powell to learn about deportment.

And this is what The Supremes learnt 
• Perform in front of the mirror – see how you look
• Sing with a smile – not like you are in pain
• Learn how to sit on a barstool elegantly, walk stairs, get out of cars 
• Always introduce yourself first, then the visitor introduce themselves
• Never see anyone for 20 minutes after a show
• Continue to grow until there is no breath in your body

In England you were taught how to handle a dazzling array of cutlery in case you went to an exclusive dinner. But the main message in all of this that you will know what to do when you meet the Queen of England.

And this is the message.

That group of three lean individuals from low grade subsidised government housing in The Brewster Projects went on to become worldwide stars. 12 number one hits in USA in three years. That was just the start.

And in 1965 they performed at Britain’s prestigious Royal Variety performance and indeed met the Queen of England.

And they knew how to conduct themselves! Years of lessons about deportment both on and off stage meant they knew exactly what to do. As did many other stars in the Motown roster which included Martha & The Vandellas, Marvin Gaye and Stevie Wonder – all megastars in their own right. I first saw Stevie Wonder perform when he was 14.

For those who don’t remember The Supremes you may know their lead singer, Diana Ross. In a recording career spanning almost 50 years she sold over 140 million records and is still performing to great reviews today while in her seventies.

But what distinguished them from the rest? In many cases they were the first black girl groups to break into the largely white supper clubs and TV shows. Sure, they can sing, but they could also put on a good show, deal with the audience and not be scared of anyone.

Why could they do this? Because they had deportment.

In the old days in Britain, the rich girls ‘came out’ (different meaning today!) after going to finishing school. They learnt how to walk in heels with a set of books balanced on their heads. These days you can record yourself, take selfies, and video yourself moving around. So observe and improve – sometimes you can’t see it yourself but a coach can help you.

Just putting someone in a posh frock and high heels doesn’t work. To again quote Margaret Thatcher: “If you have to tell people you are a lady – then you aren’t”.And all this applies in a slightly different way to the guys too!

Both need to both ‘talk the talk’ and ‘walk the walk!’

Learn all the skills before it really matters – and when time comes you can walk into the audition or job interview an unknown and come out a star!

David Rigby is a founding director of Smart Coaching & Training. He is based in Europe as an international keynote speaker, trainer, consultant, and executive coach. He developed a training practice focusing on Behavioural Preference Profiling and Signature Corporate Training suite.

Filed Under: Being Confident, Communication, Emotional Intelligence, Growing your Business, Mindset, Motivation, Personal Development, Presenting and Presentations, You and Your Career

13/11/2017 By Isla Baliszewska

Six preparations for Successful Presenting

Six preparations for Successful Presenting

Successful Presentation

“Imagine everyone in the audience with just underwear on,” we are told – but don’t imagine that will bring you all the confidence you need for a winning performance! Instead, just be sure you have ticked the list of the Top 6 Preparations for Successful Public Speaking below.

starJust like a film set you can apply some of the stage setting, preparation and rehearsal to your ultimate role in the movie. Think of all the roles that go into making a film, now think of your role as the Lead Star. It takes a team and a methodical set up behind the scenes to make the magic happen. From the director and stage manager to the wardrobe mistress and speech coach, and of course practice practice practice.

Rehearsals

Prep 1 –  Physiology:   Speech coaches have specific exercises you can perform and practice with, warming up before you start. Sentences such as “Top of the tongue, teeth and lips to ensure you deliver with your vowels well rounded and consonants crisp and clear.”  To release stress jump up and down sway your arms from side to side, and let go of any tension and trapped emotion.
Prep 2 – Emotional connection:  Studies show that in presentations how we deliver in terms of voice and posture make up 93% of the impact of a speech. Only 7% is the actual words. Practice out loud as often as possible, if you can record yourself on a smart phone you will be able to direct yourself and write an ’emotions script’ to go with the words. This way you can pinpoint where you can evoke reaction and connection with the audience, enhancing through facial expressions or pauses for contemplation.
Prep 3 – Notes:   Ideally you should not be using any notes.  If you must, then use maybe ten keywords on one or more postcards. And make sure all the pages are numbered in case you drop them!  If you have written a script then, with repetition, you may find that the words will be committed to memory which will allow you to focus on delivery. In any case, the more you use a script the less likely you will be able to tailor your presentation to the reactions of your audience.  Whether you use a tablet or paper make sure it all looks professional and larger than normal print so you are not peering at it!

Stage Management/Costume

Gen YPrep 4 – Impression:   Plan your outfit ahead of time; every detail is important here, from the undergarments to the clothes on top; think about who your audience is, if you need to present authority then dress for the part.  You have to feel confident before you start speaking, one of the easiest ways is through your clothes.  When actors are reading for a part they often start with clothing as the character develops through the way the clothes make them feel; dressed up to the nines you may see physiological changes, straightening of the back, head held high: if you have a comfy sweater on you may relax and slick the shoulders.  I often find that drawing on a persona helps with delivery, think about who you admire and model your actions on how they would present.
Prep 5 – Environment:  Where possible visit the venue where you will be speaking.  An NLP exercise is to physically draw a timeline and walk through the paces of getting up from your chair walking to the front and turning to the audience. Or if that is not possible visualise yourself making these steps.   Breathing exercises also help, so you don’t forget to take a breath.

Break glass in case of Emergency
Prep 6 – Physiological problems:   If you find your heart begins to race, your hands are sweaty or your mind goes blank, this exercise when practiced will guarantee calmness and confidence when you need it:

Close your eyes relax your tongue, breath deeply from the diaphragm and allow the emotion to pass, next think about a time where you have felt great, amazing and happy…turn up the colours, give it sound if it’s a moving picture, watch it like a film where you are in the audience. Now make an “O” sign with your thumb and forefinger, feel those good feelings inside, and harness that feeling whilst feeling the pressure of your fingertips.
This is called an NLP anchor, by repeating this process you will be able to activate good thoughts and feelings at the moment you need it.

So now you’re ready!  Have fun and enjoy your presentation.

Helen Morris

 

Filed Under: Being Confident, Presenting and Presentations

20/06/2017 By Isla Baliszewska

Presenting and Asking with Impact

Presenting and Asking with Impact

 

Great presentations

You have 4 seconds to make an impression.  (The average attention span in 2000 was 12 seconds, in 2015 it was 8.25 seconds!)

Phew, is that a challenge or what!  The takeaway is that if you want to make the right impression, you need to be prepared.  And making the right impression is something you will be wanting to do at different times of your life, be that in an interview, with your customers, with your colleagues, in a business pitch, making a presentation, on a date – goodness knows!

Giving a Speech

 

Delivering a good presentation doesn’t mean standing in front of an audience – you are presenting yourself all the time.  Whether that’s in the queue at the supermarket, at a party, or at work.  But before you freak out and think you can’t step out of the house without a 3 piece suit on or full battle make-up, take a step back and think about what you already have that makes you interesting and someone to listen to and engage with.  We don’t have time here to work through that with you, so spend some time on picking 3 things that work for you.

 

Now for a few tips to help you master the art of your presenting…

1. Make very sure you are very clear about what you want as a result from your presentation or your ASK.  If you don’t have a proper objective, you’re likely to go off piste, flounder and lose your focus.

2. Practice – practice – practice.  Unless you are one of those lucky people who is great at impactful improvising, prepare your presentation in advance, rehearse it until you feel fluent and comfortable, and practice it out loud! If possible, get feedback from someone that you trust before you launch yourself on your audience.

3. A top tip from the master of Apple – Make it all about your audience, whether it is an audience of one or millions. Know who you are going to be addressing, think about them as you would your ideal customer, how can you give them some benefit and what hassles can you relieve them of.

4.  “The success of your presentation will be judged not by the knowledge you send but by what the listener receives.” (Thank you Lily Walters).  Back to the preparation and practice piece.  With an added peppering of good clear language so there is no confusion or possibility to misunderstand your intentions and your message. Be sure the message you are giving out is the message they are receiving.

And finally, some ideas that might help you….

* For an impactful opening – A discussion of traditional and modern roles within a relationship recently revealed “Oh, we have always had a great arrangement; I make all the small decisions and my husband makes all the big ones.” Shock horror around the table until the speaker continued “And all our decisions are small ones” (accompanied with a wry smile).

* For a good compelling finish – “We are sure you can now see how much your contribution will improve the lives of ….. Before you go, tell us how you would like to make your donation…”

* And some humour, the right sort at the right time, relevant and properly delivered – “ At the very start, let me say that we both have something in common. You don’t know what I’m going to say… and neither do I.”  (Thanks to Robert Orben from his Speaker’s Handbook of Humour).

We have so many tips and techniques and good ideas to help you with that special presenting moment, so don’t hold back – contact us to open the box of goodies!

Isla Baliszewska

Filed Under: Presenting and Presentations

04/04/2016 By Isla Baliszewska

The Big Ask

The Big Ask

How Talking Books were born
How Talking Books were born

“Captain Ian Fraser lost his sight at the Battle of the Somme in July 1916, after being shot through the eyes by a German sniper. A single gunshot had robbed him of one of his greatest passions: reading. “  RNIB – How Talking Books were born

Charities have had a bit of a hard time lately, not least being frowned upon for questionable fundraising methods pressuring vulnerable people into giving. Last year Gareth G. Morgan (Professor of Charity Studies and leader of the Centre for Voluntary Sector Research) at Sheffield Hallam University) gave his valedictory lecture ‘The End of Charity’ .  In it he referred to the “extraordinary combination of threats” charities faced, including the issues of underfunded organisation,  fundraising abuses and media criticism.  He ended his talk saying  “So, what is the end to which all charity is ultimately directed?  The answer is very simple: the end of charity is public benefit. If that is our focus, both in our fundraising and our operational work, and if that can be the focus of charity regulation, then we cannot go astray.”

Halina Jaroszewska and I have been working with the RNIB fundraising staff and if we wore hats we would be constantly taking them off in deference to those fabulous people.  We have discovered the ‘public benefit‘ that this charity gives. We recently spent a day with some of them in Birmingham where we were offering our knowledge and expertise on presentation and public speaking, and where we found ourselves learning and increasing our respect for those fundraisers. Our focus for the day was the RNIB Talking Books, which began in 1935 and revolutionised reading for people with sight loss.  With a collection of over 23,000 titles, and with over 30,000 listeners, this service brings a gift to each of those listeners.

Captain Fraser’s desire to get back to reading inspired him to record an entire talking book and he began working with the RNIB in 1918 exploring how new technology could develop this recording ability.  Today, the people we were privileged enough to work with last week are now able to promote the Talking Books as their Big Ask knowing the gift that is in those Books.

“It’s like having another voice in the house.  It helps break the silence and the loneliness” (Dennis, 66,  a Talking Books reader)  – a gift of reading, of company, of meaning, of knowing someone cares.

RNIB Talking Books

 

RNIB Talking Books

www.rnib.org.uk

 

Isla Baliszewska

To find out more about how Smart Coaching & Training can help with your presentation and public speaking needs please get in touch

Filed Under: Being Confident, Presenting and Presentations

20/11/2015 By Isla Baliszewska

Presenting in the right way

Presenting in the right way

This might seem like a bit of a trumpet blower, however witnessing someone presenting with provocation and challenge while being professional, empathic and inclusive is a rare thing – not to mention captivating the audience, being truly interesting, giving new ways of doing and being.  The trumpeting bit is that one of SCT’s own, Halina Jaroszewska, is very good at this as demonstrated when I shadowed her at a recent Women in Property event hosted by Thrings in Bristol.

Steve Jobs is often touted as one of the best presenters, Forbes called him the Ultimate Communicator, not relying on wordy Powerpoints, always flowing and moving in a relaxed manner, knowing his stuff and knowing his audience and being thoroughly rehearsed.

Part of presenting well is being totally ‘on brand’ with yourself and your organisation.  Whether you are a small business, a multi-national, a leader or senior executive, when in front of others you need to punch that branding message.  Hence Halina’s compelling presentation skills, being a total brand in herself and fitting this with the brand of her audience.

Contact Halina if you want to find out how she does it.

Filed Under: Personal Development, Presenting and Presentations, Training Tagged With: training

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